Last time I shared a little bit about what happened when I got here, and what it was like. So far it was just normal kid stuff, this was before living in a garage, running away a few times, meeting the people that have shaped my life, and destroyed it. For now, let’s put that on the back burner and focus on what’s happening now. Spoiler alert, I never excel in school, I don’t go to some Ivy Leauge college, or any college for that matter. What I do is work, and try to stay alive.
I take a lot of medication, Complara, for the HIV, it’s this big purple pill, lithium for being bipolar it’s a little smaller than a dime and pink, I take one in the morning and two at night, 300 milligrams each, and I take welbutrin in the morning for energy and focus and all that, it’s small and white. The Complara is known to exacerbate psychological disorders, and ruin your kidneys, so the other drugs are to counteract that. I was diagnosed bipolar around a year and a half ago or so, I was first put on seroquel, which was okay, but it made me tired and groggy and I was still depressed. Seroquel is one hell of a drug, miss a day and you get sweaty, can’t sleep, and jittery, miss more than that and you get the shakes, vomiting (a lot), cold sweats, insomnia, me terrible thoughts. Kill yourself thoughts. Quitting that drug was just awful, for about a month I was dealing with the madness. I had to leave work a lot, because I just couldn’t function properly and I had to keep running to the bathroom.
The new medication that I take is fantastic. I’ve never felt better in my life, I get up and do things, I wake up at a normal time, and I don’t sleep for fifteen hours. Complara is the third treatment I’ve taken for the HIV, and so far it’s been the best.
Right now I work at the largest security system company in the country, I’m in sales, and my job is basically fantastic. I used to work at Walmart, that was the longest job I had, about two years, and the worst. Working at Walmart I learned a few things, the working consitions are terrible, they don’t hire enough people to do the jobs that need to be done, and they keep the pay low so people are stuck on government assistance, they get a tax write off for employing the “under privileged”. While working there I did the job of three people, quickly and efficiently, and everyone would point that out. I was actually aiming for management, and even made a request when my manager at the time was leaving the store. I didn’t get it, and when other people in the store found out they were pretty outraged, and told me I need to go somewhere better because I was “too good” for this. So I sent in a few applications to places, and landed my current job.
I’m in a sales call center, so I talk on the phone to people all day. This does not sound like a job I would excell at, my social skills are pretty bad, I hate talking on the phone to anyone, and I’m not a very pushy person, which is important for sales. As it turns out, I’m fantastic at my job. I didn’t think so for a long time until a manager said something to me, and even then I didn’t think so, until another manager said something to me, and then coworkers, and promotions happened. I still don’t think I’m as good as I want to be, but I guess that’s a good thing, always looking to improve myself.
I also work with some awesome people, they’re always funny and excited to see each other, the whole thing is just awesome, I met one of my favourite people there. I also work with someone I’ve known since high school, who got the job from his girlfriend, and she got the job from me. For awhile we spent all day every day together, I even let them live in my living room. These two have kind of a problem. They like to take pills, a lot, daily a lot. Not just take them, but crush them up and snort them. If they don’t they get angry, fidgety, some of you may know the deal. This is important, because they’ve said that she used to have a problem, to the point she would steal from people.
One day, after they moved out of my apartment and into their own, which is right behind mine, my wallet went missing. I always put it on my counter, even my dad (who lives with me) said he saw it there when he left. All day I was frantically searching. They came over, and she suggested looking by my car, in case I dropped it outside. It had poured down the night before. We looked, and I didn’t see anything, when she happened to point under a bush and said she found it. I picked it up and everything was there except thirty dollars, there were still two ones. I went up to my apartment to let my dad know I found it. I kept looking at it, and thinking “It was raining, a lot, until this morning. My car was parked by a puddle, I stepped in it to get out. If I dropped it when I got out it would’ve fallen in the puddle, been rained on all night and morning, so why is nothing wet? Even if it dried there would have been some indication that it got wet.” That’s when I knew, I kind of already knew when she just “happened” to look under the bush, but I didn’t want to know. I went to their house later and she was crying, because she knew I knew, and said “I know what it looks like, but I didn’t do it, I promise.” I knew it was a lie, but I didn’t feel like dealing with the problem. Which is the story of my life. The next day, they had drugs. There’s also been instances of money missing from my bank account when she had access to my card. He is completely oblivious to what’s going on, I don’t know how to tell him or if it’ll even help.
Here’s a little background on her life. Before they were living on my floor, which was before they lived in their apartment, they lived with her mom, and her mom’s boyfriend, and her dad. This should sound weird. Her mom is crazy, the bipolar, suicidal, alcoholic kind of crazy. That kind of crazy I usually associate with upper east side divorcées, unless it’s paired with an equally alcoholic, physically and emotionally abusive man (which in this case it was). Then I usually associate that with trash. Her father comes into the mix, because he has an incredibly bad case of Parkinson’s Desise. Her mother was his power of attorney and was also his main caregiver, this meant that she (my…friend?), was the one who fed him, cleaned him, talked to him, spent time with him, was everything he needed. While her mother collected money from his medical card in the defense that she “earned it”. I went there a few times, I’ve seen and heard and witnessed so many terrible things from that house. So I took it upon myself to get them out.
I love my friends, very deeply. My friends are my family, and I do anything I can to make sure they have the life I think they deserve because I see so much good in them. So yes, I helped push them to get out, move into an apartment, and pretty much begged them to move in with me so they could just be out immediately. I’ve seen how situations like that end, so I felt a need to change it. After they moved out she opted to move her father into a nursing home. After this the plan was for her mother to go to a rehab facility, and her boyfriend to basically just disappear from their lives. Her mother and her boyfriend moved to a different place, she screamed they were in love, told her family to screw off, they didn’t understand. A little after this she went to rehab… For about a week. When she left she went back to him, and it started all over again. Recently was the girls birthday, she didn’t know her mother was out of rehab, a month after her birthday she did. Not because he mother called her, but because a family member called and happened to say something. Something along the lines of “Well your mother just called and started asking if we’d help her come out to Texas because Instert Name Here said they wouldn’t help her get to South Carolina. She says she’s done with Mothers Boyfriends Name, and wants to change. But after last time we just told her no, we can’t try to help her anymore.”
She wasn’t to happy to find out, she had a bit of a break down not because she didn’t get a call on her birthday, but she’s been out for months and she never called. Her boyfriend called though, a few months ago to ask for my friend’s (the girls boyfriend) mom’s phone number. Turns out it was because his mom the dog that her mom wants, and her moms boyfriend was going to pick it up for her.
I’m not making excuses for what she allegedly did with the wallet, and my card, just giving a bit of background of what led us to this point, and why things that happen may have happened. I guess that’s the moral of my life, I’m not making excuses for what I did, just explaining how it led to that point, and what happened after.
aaronmayday 